A Daughter's Dreams Can Come True
Boys and girls are quite different in many ways. Girls tend to be more independent and emotionally aware of their surroundings. Little girls can be girly in pretty dresses and act like tomboys. It is important for parents who have daughters to understand the type of issues that a girl can face. Even at a young age, girls tend to want to fit in with other kids. Girls tend to worry about what other people think about them in everyday life. The stigma of appearance and perception that girls face throughout life can be a challenge. Their emotions tend to get hurt easier and girls can be more vulnerable to peer pressure. I realized even at the young age of three, how much influence others had no my daughter and her feelings. She wanted to be accepted and liked by other kids when she started pre-school. I did not realize how much of an impact this had on her feelings and emotions until one day she was kicked off the bus.
I could not imagine what a three-year-old could have done to get this type of punishment. The bus driver told me that a little girl did not want to be friends with my daughter. When the little girl told her this; she punched the girl in the face. I did not know where she learned this type of behavior at such a young age. I was shocked that she had inflicted violence on another child like that. I asked her why she hit the girl on the bus. “She did not want to be my friend”. I recapped this story and told her that it was the other girls’ choice to not want to be her friend. It was not okay to go around hitting people. That kind of response would not get her any friends. I did not want her to think that she can go through life threatening people to get what she wanted. She tells me she did not hit just because she didn’t want to be her friend, but hit her because she hurt her feelings”. At that very moment, I knew I had my work cut out for me.
As a parent, I realized that it was very important to talk to my daughter and have her talk to me. I wanted her to feel that she could come to me with any problem and feel comfortable discussing it. I knew how important it was for me to be able to do that as a child and wanted her to feel the same trust with me. An impressionable little girl can easily pick up actions of others that are not acceptable. I often communicated to her about how to treat other people and that it is not okay to hurt someone. Treat others the way that she wanted someone to treat her. This had sunk in because she had never inflicted harm on another child again.
Girls can be hard on themselves because of their sporadic emotions. With me being a female, it would be easier for her to talk to me about many girl issues. I wanted that type of relationship with her and hoped that she would communicate with me before making hasty decisions. So far that has worked out well. She and her friends have come to me with their problems and other situations that they could not discuss with their own parents. It made me feel good that not only does my daughter know I am not going to judge her for telling me things but that her friends feel just as comfortable doing the same. When girls feel comfortable enough to discuss anything and everything with you; then it is our job as parents to guide them in the right direction. A mother’s approval can be a huge impact on a growing girls’ life. Girls will often look up to their mothers because they admire them. It is important for a mom to be the person that they want their little girls to grow up to be. A girl needs to know that it is okay to make mistakes and that it is normal. Express to your daughter that mistakes is how we learn and grow as a person. It is okay to try something and not be good at it the first time. It is perfectly fine to not give up because eventually practice makes perfect. A healthy mother and daughter relationship stems from communication.